What should you expect from a Coach?

What should you expect from a Coach?

At the start of every season, I always think about how I want my players and parents to view me as a coach, and what should they expect from me throughout the season. Like all coaches, I want to serve my players to the best of my ability and provide them with opportunities to grow and develop, but just wanting those things is not enough. There are certain behaviors and qualities of a coach that are required to create that type of competitive learning environment for the players. With this in mind, there are certain things we should all expect from coaches throughout the season.

Professionalism

This is a broad term and can mean a lot of things to a lot of people, but I think it is important to try to define. I think of it this way… If I having surgery, how would I expect my doctor to behave and communicate with me in order for me to feel confident being under the doctor’s care?

When we think of professionalism with youth coaches, I think we should define it by how we expect a coach to behave and communicate to entrust the players under the coach’s care. Professionalism is the foundation of building trust with the players and parents, and it needs to be at the forefront of what coaches think about in regards to the approach of the season.

Simple things like being on time, being dressed in proper training gear, having a practice plan, wearing a watch, being early, having practice set up before the players arrive are all things that I would define as “professional.” Greeting the players as they arrive at training, saying good-bye as they leave, and looking your players in the eye when speaking to them are other examples.

How a coach speaks to players during a training session and game are important as well. What is coming out of the coach’s mouth? Not necessarily tone and inflection,  (although very important), but the content of what is being said. Is it informational or does it lack substance? Does it inform or demean?  Is it how you would expect a “professional” to speak?

Empathy

A coach by definition must care about the players. Without empathy for your player’s current ability level, mental and physical state, and needs to grow and develop, there is no way for a coach to reach the players. You must know your players in order to help them through the tough phases of growth that require a sincere understanding of what they are going through.

When players know that the coach cares for them as an individual and genuinely wants them to be successful, even if they disagree with the coach, trust can be built in the player-coach relationship that is necessary for the relationship to work. A coach who has empathy towards the players does not ever assume anything about the players. When a kid struggles, it is not just determined that he or she will never be good enough or just does not have what it takes to move forward. Coaches who have empathy, take responsibility to find a way to reach the player and help the player through struggles by empowering the player through targeted, empathetic, coaching techniques.

Honesty

May seem obvious, but honesty is something we should expect from a coach. Although most would agree with this on the surface, they do not really mean it. Honesty means telling the truth to your players EVEN when it is something they do not want to hear. Honestly from a coach can be very difficult for a player, and parent, to hear. Often, it is not what we WANT to hear, but it is what we NEED to hear. In the moment, it may “sting” a little and be uncomfortable, but great coaches know it is necessary to help a player grow and learn.

Another side of this that is not talked about a lot is honestly from coaches about their own actions and behaviors. How often have you heard a coach tell a player, “I was wrong” throughout the season? Probably, not very often. Now, does that mean coaches are infallible? Of course not, coaches make mistakes as often as the players. With that in mind, it shows an incredible amount of professionalism and honesty when a coach can tell a player when he or she was wrong.

As we ask the players to be able handle honest feedback from coaches, coaches need to be able to handle honest feedback from their players, parents, and themselves.  

Knowledge & Information

I have not worked with a player who does not want to learn. Players expect and want coaches to teach them throughout the year.  During training and games, the players want and need information that can help them learn, develop, and continuously perform at a higher level. Players want to be better! They need the information to be better.

Corrections during training and games need to contain that information. Too often it does not. It is either more of a command (MOVE! GET OPEN!) or a sarcastic question (What was that?!). Although commonly heard, what information can the player take from those statements? More importantly, how does saying that make the player better?

When coaches provide insight and key points and ideas about how to play the game, and the players can see that it helps their level of play, players become even more receptive to the information. When coaches say players have “shut down,” I often think about why a player would do that. I feel players “shut down” when they feel the information coming to them is not helping them improve so it is not longer worth the effort of trying to understand or apply it.

Demonstration

Although a coach’s ability to demonstrate may vary due to their playing experience and level, I do think this is a key element of effective coaching. Being able to show your players how to perform a skill or do what is being asked, paints a better picture than trying to describe it with words.  I think players appreciate their coach trying to demonstrate what is being asked. Even if it is not the best example, it shows the players two things: 1) The coach is engaged and fully committed to trying to help them understand the concept being taught. 2) When the coach does not do it perfectly, it gives the players permission, without saying it, that it is ok to make mistakes.

Many coaches are nervous to demonstrate in fear of making a mistake or not painting a good picture. What kind of message does that send to the kids? Aren’t we asking them to do the same thing at training? In order to get better, coaches are consistently asking players to do things outside their current level, and in doing so, are putting them in a situation where they will struggle and fail at times.  One of the best things, we can do as coaches is to physically show the players that it is OK by our willingness to try.

Push

If you do not want your coach to push you, than you should probably not play sports.  One of the driving goals of all coaches is to PUSH kids out of their comfort zone and ask them to do more than they thought possible. It is one of a coach’s primary responsibilities. You should never expect your coach to allow a player to just be satisfied what they can currently do.

We all need that push and shove some time to move us past the friction of fear of failing or complacency’s glue. Every day at training and in games, coaches should be expected to help their players demand more from themselves and never be satisfied.

Great competitors want to be challenged. Not just by an opponent, but by those who are entrusted to teach and mentor them. They do not want to be handled with velvet gloves and feed off the excitement of the push from a coach.

Safety

The “Push” only works when players feel safe. When players know coaches care about their best interest and they know they will never be put in a situation that is dangerous, physically or mentally, the player is more likely to respond and benefit from the “push” of a coach.

When players fear being ridiculed or humiliated, they are much less likely to put themselves “out there” and try to reach beyond their current limits. Reaching beyond your limits makes you more susceptible to mistakes, so for a player in an unsafe environment, the risk outweighs the reward.  If a player does not feel a coach cares about his physical state, the player is much less likely to give his all on another sprint or work as hard during training with the fear of the amount of fitness punishment is coming at the end.

Like all of us, players are going to perform better and enjoy playing the game in an environment that they feel is safe. That does not mean the environment is not challenging or hard. It just means that the well-being of the player is always the primary concern in every action taken and word spoken by the coach.

There are an endless number of things we should expect from a coach throughout the season. The list is never ending and should always be evolving. With each team being a little different, every player a little different, every situation a little different, a coach should constantly be evaluating what he needs to do best serve his players. It constantly changes, but there are always a few underlying principles that coaches place at the foundation of their approach.

When A Coach Promises Scholarships

Run. No, seriously, run as fast as you can in the other direction. Like a late night TV ad on how you can get rich quick if you follow a simple 3 step plan, you NEED to change the channel. One of the most ridiculous things I hear around youth sports is a coach promising a better chance to receive a scholarship to play in college if a player plays or trains with that “coach.” What is even more frustrating is that some parents actually believe it. As a player who did receive a scholarship to play in college, I want to say that NO COACH, I EVER PLAYED FOR OR TRAINED WITH, EVER PROMISED ME, ANYTHING! Scholarships are not given. They are earned. Great coaches know that, and I had great coaches. That is why none of them EVER talked about scholarships. They only talked about what I could do to get better. Why? Because that is all that matters.

First, receiving a scholarship to play college sports is very rare compared to the number of kids who play sports. If you’re curious, it is around 2% (according to CBS sports). Some stats may vary some, but I think you get the idea. There is about a 98% chance your child will not receive a scholarship to play college sports. Your kid should be focused on academics to get themselves into college. Sports is not going to be the vehicle that gets them there.

With this in mind, it seems ludicrous for a coach, trainer, or organization to dangle scholarships as a selling point for their program. If they are going to lie to people, why stop there? How about they offer a winning lottery ticket or some ocean front property in Kansas? In terms of trying to sell their ability as a coach, and to help a player improve, those type of “selling points” mean just as much. In other words, they tell you nothing about what your child should expect when playing and training with that coach. A scholarship promise just tells you that the coach is pretty confident in his ability to make promises he or she cannot keep.

Scholarships are earned by the player. They are earned over years of hard work and dedication. It is something that is mainly influenced by the player. It does not matter how good a coach is if the player is not willing to put in the time and effort to train that is required to play at a higher level. In terms of earning a scholarship to play, that is a completely different commitment level, effort, and sometimes….luck (right place, right time) that goes way beyond the amount of work needed to just play at the college level.

A player has never earned a scholarship because he trained or played with me. Any player who I have coached who earned a scholarship did not get a scholarship because of me. I have never used a player who has earned a scholarship as a sales point for other players in an attempt to try to convince them to play or train with me. Why? Simply, it is wrong. Doing that completely takes credit away from the person who earned the scholarship, THE PLAYER, not the coach. It is trying to boost yourself up on some else’s achievements.

Coaches should be proud of their players’ accomplishments, celebrate with them, be happy for them, and continue to help them achieve great things, but they should never take credit for it. That is not what great coaches do. Great coaches do not want the accolades. They do not need the spotlight. They work hard to put their players’ goals and ambitions in front of their own, and when their players achieve great things, they let those kids have the stage to themselves. Although coaches play a big part in a player’s development, we are only one of MANY guiding forces and factors that lead kids down their chosen path.

If it was just the coach, if the coach was really the only key difference maker, than every player who worked with a certain coach would all rise to nearly the same level. But, we know that is not the case. Even in the most prestigious training academies around the world, where they have tried to get development down to a science, most players never make it all the way through to the end.

In the end, it is very disingenuous to use scholarships and hopes of playing in college as a recruiting tool or selling point for any coach, team, or program. It is simply something NO ONE can deliver on. What you can sell is who you are as coach, how you train, your core beliefs about player development, and who you are as a person.  These are the only things any coach can control, and the only thing a coach can ever promise a kid who plays for them.

Work Away from the Ball

It is the most under appreciated aspect of the game. Although critical to a team’s success, it is what gets the least amount of attention from spectators, coaches, and the players. When watching a game, we tend to follow the ball. That is where the action is so that is the most logical place to look, but what is happening away from the ball can be just as important. Often what is happening away from the ball is about to be the reason for what happens next in the game. Whether a goal is scored or conceded, or possession is won or lost, the reason for it usually happened away from the ball. With this in mind, it is important we coach and praise the importance of the tremendous amount of running many players do during the game but normally do not get much credit.

While Cristiano Ronaldo is “dancing” on the ball and impressing us with his skill, there are others around him that are creating space for him to dribble into and covering him defensively as he works on the ball. Without his teammates working hard off the ball to create space for him to dribble into and exploit, even a player as talented as him would struggle to find room on the field to be successful on the ball. As he dribbles, players are moving to create passing options pulling defenders out of good defensive positions and opening up gaps for Ronaldo to pass through or dribble through to penetrate forward.

On the other end, players around him are filling gaps left behind him, which could make the team defensively vulnerable if he loses possession. When a player like him runs with the ball, it can create an imbalance in the team shape that could leave the team open to being countered on. As he works hard to move the ball forward, others work hard off the ball to fill the space he leaves open to make sure the team is balanced defensively if the ball is lost. In transition, Ronaldo could not recover in time, so others must be willing to work hard away from the ball to cover areas of the field he would may normally defend.

This is true for all players, not just Ronaldo, but a good example of how others, without much recognition, work tirelessly away from the ball to help the players on the ball look good.

With a team I am coaching, I tend to watch what players are doing away from the ball more than what the player on the ball is doing. If a player loses possession, my first thing considered is how the player was being supported. What movement and work was being done away from the ball to help provide options or space for the player on the ball to use. If space was provided and the work away from the ball was being done, then I turn my attention back to the player who lost possession to help him learn how to use the options created by his teammates’ efforts.

On the defensive side of the ball, the person pressuring the ball is a key first part of defending, but has little impact if the other players on the field are not working to limit space and options. A player who closes down a player on the ball with a great angle of approach, speed, and body positioning will easily be beat if there is not sufficient work being done behind the first defending player. There is only so much space a single defender can cover and take away, so without adequate support it is easy for an attacking player to exploit the space not covered by the defender’s teammates. Often a player on the ball will lose possession, not because of the quality of pressure from the first defender, but the quality of work being done behind the first defender.

As you watch games, try to watch what is happening away from the ball. See if you can identify the players who run tirelessly to create passing options for teammates, who fill open space the other team cannot exploit when attacking, who run hard to balance a team’s shape when attacking and defending. These players may not score the goals or win every ball, but goals are scored and balls are won because of these selfless individuals. They are the ultimate team players because they will do what is necessary to help the team have success and they do not ask for or expect any credit for it. As fans of the game, I think it is time to give these players more credit.

For young players, it is important we teach the importance of this part of the game and praise this kind of effort each time we can. Most kids feel like they did not have a good game if they did not score a goal or have an assist. Of course, those always make a game better. I always felt better after a game I scored a goal or had an assist, but I was lucky to have coaches who praised work off the ball. One coach made it a point to always make sure credit was given to the players off the ball that created or prevent a goal. He would yell from the sideline, “That was because of you.” Whether it was a run off the ball or an 80 yard recovery run, the coach gave credit to the underappreciated efforts on the field.

As coaches, parents, and fans, let's give credit where credit is due. Love and enjoy the beautiful aspects of the game and the players who make the game very exciting and fun to watch, BUT give some love to the players who do the hard, dirty, gritty work (behind the scenes) that make the game so much fun to watch.

Starve the Beast

There are many benefits of taking time off during the year as a competitive athlete. The obvious ones are mental and physical rest the body needs in order to stay healthy and avoid overuse injuries or “burnout.” The amount of rest needed changes from player to player depending on age, competitive level, and personal needs. In short everyone is different, and so is the need for rest and recovery. But what is the best thing about rest? The answer is the least talked about benefit and the one I found to be the most helpful as a developing young player. In short, REST STARVES THE BEAST, and when the time is right, you let the beast eat again.

Let me explain… I hated taking time off from playing soccer. I had to be pulled kicking and screaming away from the soccer field. I would even go as far as to sneak out to play or lie about where I was going when leaving the house with my friends (sorry mom). My coaches and my mom constantly encouraged breaks and stressed they were necessary, but I was a kid who loved the play and I did not care about what was “necessary” or “good for me”.... I just wanted to play.

I had a coach that finally got me to buy into the “rest” concept with the “Starve the Beast” approach. Simply, he explained that you have this beast inside of you who loves to play and feasts every time you step on the field. He will always eat and he is always hungry, but he can only eat so much at time. He told me that I needed that beast ready to eat every time I step on the field. When I rested, or when I starved the beast, he could eat a whole lot more.

It is not easy to starve the beast. The urge to let the beast eat and go play is strong and it takes discipline to ignore it. But when done right, and at the right time, when I stepped on the field to play again, the beast was hungry to eat more than he was before. In other words, the “beast” was willing to work harder, for longer, and break through any barriers that stood between him and his food. After a break, I learned that my level of play and level of training drastically increased.

As a kid, I did not care or really relate at all to the idea of stopping burnout or overuse injuries. Why? Because I was a kid! Those things did not mean anything to me, and I did not feel it was something I would have to deal with no matter how much I played. Although I could have been negatively affected by those things, it was not going to stop me from playing and training. When this coach explained the “starve the beast” concept, it made more sense to me.

Of course I saw myself as “the beast” (what kid does not want to be a BEAST), so it became something I bought into because I understood it and I related to it. After a break, I noticed the difference in my effort, attitude, and level of play after a break. I recognized how the BEAST responded when I got back on the field. When I stepped on the field, I wanted to show everyone what the BEAST could do, and I wanted to let the beast EAT.

When you have a passionate kid who loves something and pursues it relentlessly, parent and coach request to take breaks is not going to convince the kid to put the soccer ball away. It just does not make sense to the child to do that. The equation is simple… I love something, doing it makes me happy, so I am going to continue to do it. The starve the beast approach is not just fun, it acknowledges the kids passion and drive to continue to do it. It says, “I know you want to play, I know you’re a BEAST, but watch what happens when you cage the beast for a bit and then let him loose when he is rested and HUNGRY.”

My parents made it fun. When my break was up, the question would be asked, “Are you ready to let the beast eat?” I would always answer, “Oh, he’s ready to eat.” Then off to training I would head. Normally to one of my best training sessions I had in a very long time.

Make sure your child takes time to “starve the beast.” Not only will it help prevent injuries and burnout, but it will also set your child up to have more success on the field in the future. In short, breaks are good. They are necessary. BUT, you need to find a way to get your child to accept the need for a break. Just saying, “you need a break” may not do the trick. It may just cause frustration or resentment. Try the “starve the beast” approach, or something similar, and make the time off away from the game something they will welcome.

A "Sometimes" Player

With over 15 years of working with players, regardless of ability, I have found the most distinctive difference between players is whether or not a player is an “ALWAYS” player or a “SOMETIMES” player. Always players are exactly what they sound like. No matter the day, time, activity, game, or any other circumstance, they ALWAYS give a maximum effort. They do not take breaks or choose when to compete and work hard. There is no compromise or variability to their approach to training or games. It does not mean that every performance is their best, but they always give their best effort.

Then, there is the “SOMETIMES” players, and they are exactly what they sound like. They give their best effort and work hard sometimes. Not always, but when it is usually the easiest or most convenient for them. Or even worse, only when they are certain it is in their own best interest.

Here are some situations where “SOMETIMES” players shine, and the different approach of the “ALWAYS” players:

“It is Fun”

Of course. It is easier to give a good effort when we are having a good time. To work hard when it is not your favorite thing to do, is much harder. Ironically, the things we enjoy doing the least, often are what benefit us the most. I have trained players that completely change their work rate and attitude as soon as the training session consists of something they find fun and enjoy.

In contrast, an “ALWAYS” player does not require it to be fun for the effort to be given. Although they like certain things more than others, they do not let that affect their drive to play or miss an opportunity to improve.

“They Can Do It”

These players love to show people what they can do, but are scared to be seen struggling at anything. When they can do a task and do it very well, then they are willing to give a good effort. But, when something is hard or just out of their reach, they stop working hard for it. They find it easier to believe they could not do it because they did not CARE TO DO IT. Not that they were not able, but they just convinced themselves it was not worth it, it was below them, or just marginalized the importance of the activity. This approach helps them feel better about not being able to do it, and does not make them look vulnerable struggling to learn it.

On the other hand, “ALWAYS” players like the opportunity to do things they do not know how to do. They embrace the struggle and will not be discouraged or embarrassed by failure. They have learned that for each moment of struggle comes a lifetime of rewards.

“They Will Win”

These players play hard and with confidence when they are NOT in a fight. When they know they can easily walk over an opponent and get the result they want, you can see their energy level rise and often this is when they are at their best. On the flip side, when the opponent is tough, or they are completely outmatched, they shut down. They disengage from the game, begin making excuses, blaming others, faking injuries or fatigue, or anything else that excuses them from taking responsibility of the result. Often after or during this type of situation, the player will seem apathetic about the result or his performance.

The “ALWAYS” player always tries to compete at his best level. Although he will have “off and on” days, it is never an excuse for a drop in effort and his competitive level. Normally, as the opponent gets tougher, this type of player uses it as fuel to push beyond his current level or drives him to train harder in the future. He learns from the experience, does not make excuses for himself or others, and does not blame anyone. Not even himself. He just goes back to work so he can fight even harder next time.

“Playing with a Friend”

There is a social aspect of the game and it is important. Although it is a lot of fun to play with friends, there will be times when that is not possible. I see this a lot in training sessions. If certain players are not paired with who they want to play with, their effort drops considerably. If they do get paired with who they want to play with, then their level of play is much higher. When they are not on their friend’s team, the body language changes drastically, head drops down, and I know the players is going to give half the effort he normally would.

An “ALWAYS” player may prefer to play with certain kids, but he never lets it show. No matter who he is playing with he will do everything he can to support and play with the other players on the team. Regardless of level, this type of player gravitates towards being a leader on the field and knows success is a group effort. He relies on the other players and they rely on him. He knows not giving his best effort is an insult to his other teammates on the field.

“Coach/Parent is Watching”

For me this is the most common example of the “SOMETIMES” player but the most subtle form of it. When a coach or their parents are nearby, I can see a distinct increase in their level of play and energy. For people watching, this looks like an “ALWAYS” player, but if you can sneak peaks of these types of players training when they do not think anyone is watching, that is when the “SOMETIMES” is exposed. This can be the most self-destructive form of the “SOMETIMES” player. When kids learn to only work hard when people are watching, it will be very hard to achieve anything, on or off the field. Most of the things earned in life are worked for when no one else is around or when no one is asking you to do it.

An “ALWAYS” player does not care who is watching or not. Often, their effort is even higher when they are alone. They are not doing it for anyone else. It is not about pleasing or gaining approval of another person. It is about making sure they never let down themselves or others who rely on them when the whistle blows. They have set an unbelievable expectation for themselves to meet. Higher than anyone else could ever put on them. They hold themselves accountable to never falling below those expectations.

“SOMETIMES” players grow into “SOMETIMES” adults. “ALWAYS” players grow into “ALWAYS” adults. This is an important lesson to teach kids from an early age as it will play an important role in the rest of their lives. When we help players become “ALWAYS” people, they not only have a better chance of succeeding in soccer, but in even more important aspects of their lives.

Train the 90

In business, an “80/20 rule” is often talked about in regards to productivity and profits. It is believed that 80 percent of a company’s revenue/success/profits comes from 20 percent of its activities. Now, when thinking about soccer and what helps a player be successful on the field, how does that translate? This stat made me think about the way I train players and where do I focus their energy during training sessions. What activities and game situations do I put them in to help them improve their level of play and be prepared for the game? Over the years, it has changed the way I approach my training with players. I decided to spend the vast majority of my time with players to “Train the 90” during my training sessions, not the 10.

I believe high level players are high level because they can do the basic and consistently used skill movements the game requires of them at an extraordinary level (the 90 percent). Both the speed and effectiveness of their ability with those skills makes their level of play beyond the common player. Simple tasks in the game are done with very few errors, and are performed without much thought… almost subconsciously.

If you watch a professional match, you see all players doing the same things 90 percent of the game. Receiving the ball, passing over different distances, dribbling, moving off the ball, and defending are the most common activities of each player on the field. When players are excellent in these areas, they can do what the game requires of them 90 percent of the time. Often progress and development in these areas comes in three forms:

1. Speed in which these skills are executed.
2. The less time and space needed to execute them.
3. Recognition of when, where, why, and how to use them.

During training sessions, I tell players all the time that if they can do the simple, every game activities, with consistency and speed, they can be a higher level player. I tell them to “Train the 90” on their own as often as they can, and spend less time on the 10. Frankly, when the 90 can be done at a high level, the 10 is much easier to learn and perform when needed. Unfortunately, with a generation of YouTube watchers and street soccer style moves, the players tend to spend more of their time on the 10 when training on their own. I believe all practice with the ball is beneficial, but what type of training is the most effective? What gives the best return on your time?

Think of it this way… if you go to the gym, that is obviously better than not going. But when you are there, do you make the most of your time and effort to see the results you want?

Now, as I said before, I think many of the YouTube channels with crazy skill moves and trick shots do serve a great purpose for players. It provides players with ideas and spurs imagination and creativity with the ball. Although, many of the activities are overly complicated or require a lot of expensive equipment to do on your own, and I think it has re-focused players on training and practicing the 10 percent (or sometimes 1%) of skills they rarely ever use in a game.

Why do I say that? I have worked with players (and played with players) that can do some crazy tricks with the ball, but lack the fundamentals. They struggle to receive and pass or even run with the ball at speed while keeping it under control, but can dazzle you with a couple juggling tricks, and fancy lift, or one “sick” skill move. All while their passing and receiving, two areas that are critical for a player to have success, are not at the level required to play the game at an average level. Although the tricks are fun to watch and impressive, it does not make up for how often the player loses the ball.

In short, when the whistle blows, it is not a YouTube trick competition. It is the game, and if you are not prepared to do what the game requires you to do, “The 90”, the game will expose your lack of ability in the fundamental areas of the game.

I know the basics are not as much fun as the fancier skill moves to do in training, but then again, you have to consider what you are training and practicing to do. Are you training to be able to perform tricks or are you training to improve your level of play? It is not always the same type of training.

As coaches, our goal is to help kids play the game at a high level. It is not to help them perform training activities at a high level or be great on video clips. With that goal in mind, what do our training sessions look like? Are the activities all about improving skill areas and movements commonly used in the game? Does the activity look and feel like the game?

As I tell players all the time in training, I am not trying to get them to improve their ability to do a training activity, I am trying to help them improve their ability to play the game. Within each activity, I ask them not to focus on the activity, but play the game within the task. Nothing is done in a vacuum in the game. Every movement and action in a game leads into another movement, has a consequence, and requires adjustments (constantly). This is how I ask players to train. It is always about what is next, what was the result of their action, and how they can adjust when needed.

I am not demonizing the teaching of tricks and complicated skill combinations as I teach those as well. BUT, and this is important, I think these items should make up a very small percentage of a training session. Let’s say about 10%. When you consistently “Train the 90”, the things your players will repeatedly and consistently be asked to do in the game, they will be more prepared than players who spend too much time on the 10%.

Now if you are training the next generation of YouTubers, than spend more time on the 10%. But if your goal is to help develop the next generation of high level players, you should be focusing on the 90%. “Train the 90” and make sure your players are prepared for what they will be asked to do when they step on the field to play.

5 Questions to Ask Your Coach

One of the things all players need to do more is ask questions. I challenge every player I coach to ask questions during training sessions, before, during, or after games, and any other time they are not sure about anything. Unfortunately, we live in a culture where most people, including youth soccer players, do not like to appear like they do not have all the answers already. Especially when around their peers, kids are very hesitant to ask questions in fear of being judged by the other players, or even the coach. More often than not, players (all of us really) would rather pretend like we understand than ask a question to get help we need to perform at a higher level. Our fear of being seen as incompetent outweighs our desire to improve.

So during the season, I would challenge all players to ask questions of their coaches when anything is unclear or to get a deeper understanding of an aspect of the game they feel they already know. All of us, coaches, parents, and players, should always be seeking more information and knowledge to help us make good decisions and elevate our level of “play” on the field and off the field.

Here are 5 things a player should never hesitate to ask your coach:

1. What are my weakest areas as a player? Be ready for the answer to this question. Often people ask for feedback and they only want to hear good things. Too negative of a response and we do not take it well. As a player, one who wants to be great, you WANT to hear the negative. The positive does not help a player improve, but it makes them feel good and build confidence (so it is important to). When a coach is very honest with a player about what he needs to improve, it is the most valuable information the player receives. Listen intently, make sure you understand, and then go to work making it a strength.

2. What are your expectations of …. ? All coaches are different and no two have the same views about almost anything. Each will have a different opinion about how the game should be played, players should act, and what makes up a great player. Although I hope a coach would make this clear before the season, it does not always happen. There are a lot of assumptions. A coach assumes players know what he wants, and the players assume they understand what the coach expects. Often, both are wrong and it is a key reason for confusion and misunderstanding. Find out what your coach expects from you, and work hard at exceeding those expectations.

3. What is my role within the team? Coaches see every player in some type of role within the team. For the team to be successful, each player must play their role so the team can reach their goals. You hear coaches say, “Know your job.” On a soccer team, a forward, midfielder, defender, and goalkeeper can play very different roles and have very different “jobs.” Each coach will ask those players to play those positions very differently. Players will assume that playing forward for one coach is the same as playing for another coach. It is not. Within the system the team plays, your role can be very different. Make sure you know your role on the field (know your job) and execute!

4. What did YOU do as a player? Coaches need to know their players in order to coach them effectively. But, players should also know their coaches in order to play for them effectively. Understanding a coach’s background, playing experience, coaching experience, and how they played the game, often gives valuable insight to why and how the coach teaches the way he or she does. We are all influenced by our past and experiences, and a coach is no different. Coaches often reflect the way they were as a player in their approach to teaching the game. As you learn more about a coach’s playing past, habits, successes, and failures, it is easier to anticipate what the coach will do or say before the coach says it or does it.

5. Why? As a coach, I love this question from players. After explaining something during a training session or during a game, I appreciate when a player asks why. For me, this is a clear sign that either player wants to learn more about what I was talking about, or the player does not understand why I am asking them to play a certain why. Players often understand what I am asking them to do, but often do not know WHY they are doing it. As a coach, I try to explain the why, but I know not every player gets it or maybe even agrees with it. By asking why, a player can not just know what they are doing, but can understand why they are doing it and how it relates to the game. This is probably the most important part of the education piece of coaching. When players do something without understanding why, the slightest change in any aspect of the task will leave the players left unsure about what to do. When the WHY is clear, a player can make appropriate adjustments to any changes in the game or in a training activity. They can take the same principles of the WHY and apply it to any other situation to make a better decision.

Just ask questions….that is all I am saying. Too often, players are passive onlookers in their own development. Players should take control of their development, own their development, by asking important questions to coaches throughout the year. As a coach, I have learned a lot from my players asking questions about training activities and the way I ask them to play the game. In answering, I feel I helped them become a better player and student of the game, and it challenged me to fully understand my coaching approach and philosophy.

Simply, when we stop asking questions, we stop learning. When we stop learning, we stop growing.

This Article is Not For You

None of my articles are for you. None of the other articles you read are either. There is a lot of information out there about a lot of things. If you are reading this, you are probably looking for information about your child’s youth soccer experience, ways to help your team this season, or anything else I have written about in the past. All of the articles I have written, the information I have posted on Facebook and Instagram have all been about my opinions and views of youth soccer, but none of that information was written specifically for you.

When you read articles and information about youth soccer, you can find opinion after opinion about anything you are interested in reading about. It is important to remember that most of it is opinion and there are very few facts or indisputable positions. As such, there are very few absolute rights or absolute wrongs. I am not saying absolutes do not exist, but they are not as prevalent as we are led to believe.

So, when reading these articles and applying them to your child’s playing experience or how to approach coaching your team, it is important to not just accept it as fact and decide that it is the right way to guide your kid or your team. There is something to take away from each article, great information and philosophies to give you ideas and things to consider, but it is rare that any article, post, or blog perfectly fits or encompasses all the unique characteristics of your child and team.

It is not that one person’s opinion is right or one person’s opinion is wrong. It is just two different opinions. Based on personal experience, education, and their perspective on what is best. In reality, every opinion is right, and each one is wrong depending how, when, where, and why it is applied. I have found few absolute answers in anything in life, and soccer is no different.

I was listening to a cable news show the other night, and a guest was talking about how we all form opinions on incomplete information. We don’t know it all (although we like to think so). He went on to talk about how strong opinions are good, passionately defending what you believe in is important, but we have lost a sense of MODESTY in our discussions and debates. When we get to the point when anyone who disagrees with us is either stupid, uneducated, misguided, ignorant, unenlightened, or is demonized, than we have lost our own personal sense of modesty in our stances. That modesty is grounded in the fact that we do not have all the facts. Especially in regards to other people’s lives and experiences.

Many of us who write articles for coaches and parents are doing it to help improve the youth soccer experience for everyone. But, I know, and I think others do as well, that our opinions do not fit perfectly or directly relate to everyone. When you try to apply principles and practices where they do not work or apply, they fail. Not because the principles or practices are flawed, but the logic of implementing them is.

We see this across the board in all aspect of our lives. From politics, to our jobs, to schools, to money, to raising kids, and to the playing field, everyone has the “new” and “better” way to do….whatever. Granted, we are all beneficiaries of those who challenged the status quo and found sensible approaches to problems and needs, but with all the advancements and changes, we all personally find ways to incorporate them in our lives or stick to the old way. We all have our reasons, right or wrong in the eyes of others, but most of us do it because it works for us. It makes sense in our reality and in the life we desire to build.

So when I write articles, and others write articles, they are not specifically for you. I do not hope you go back and change they way you approach your child’s soccer experience or coach your team. My only hope is that you are able to take something from it that helps you with your child’s soccer experience or team. My articles have ideas you agree with or the information helps reaffirm your own opinions which are different. Either way, that is exactly what I am hoping for when writing each article.

In short, this article is not for you. None of my articles are. They do not specifically, or perfectly, apply to anyone or any situation. BUT, I hope each article spurs thought and consideration, forces you to ask hard questions of yourself and others, and helps guide you, your child, or team down the path that YOU decide is best.

The New Form of Specialization: The Multi-Sport Athlete

There has been a lot of research and articles about the dangers of kids specializing in sports too early in hopes for a future career in the sport or scholarship opportunities down the road. Outside of physical and mental burnout, risk of more injuries, and the “fun” being removed from the game, many players deal with pressure from adults to excel on the playing field. The game becomes more about the adults than it does about what is best for the kids. The good news is that it seems parents are taking note and kids are doing other sports or activities throughout the year. The problem is that it seems an important step was skipped. Now instead of doing just one sport, kids are “specializing” in multiple sports. In other words, we forgot to take anything away, and we just keep adding on to the problem.

The idea is correct. It is important for players to play and experience different sports and activities as they grow up. Outside of developing better athletes, it helps prevent overuse injuries and creates well-rounded individuals with a more diverse youth sports experience.

The move away from early specialization and its benefits relies a child playing multiple sports or activities, but not necessarily multiple at the same time. This is the detail that was overlooked by some and now kids are not specializing in just one sport, but are specializing in many sports. In some cases, the situation has gone from one extreme to the other.

With this comes a new kind of burnout and over-scheduled kids who are training 4 plus hours a night in multiple sports. They run from basketball practice to soccer practice, or lacrosse practice to baseball practice, or track to volleyball. Parents do their best to try to manage the schedules and avoid overlap as much as possible so the kid can avoid missing a game or practice for both sports.

The demands of one practice, workload, intensity, what is physically or mentally targeted, is not at all coordinated with the other practices and game schedules. One practice may be a walk through before a game or recover day after a game, and the other practice could be a physically intense session with a lot of fitness oriented activities. In this case, both coaches, are trying to do what is best for their players, but since it is two separate sports with two different schedules, one practice can be very counter productive to the other. In short, it is much harder, and almost impossible, to manage the player’s mental and physical well being due to their being no collaboration between the coaches and sports.

This is not the coach’s fault as most run their teams and seasons in relation to just that season and team. It would be a tall order for coaches to manage their teams and players based on everyone’s extra sports or activities. It falls on the responsibility of the parents and the players to manage their schedules to make sure there is a good balance between both sports and life outside of sports.

Some players who do this are not playing sports on two “competitive” teams, but instead, are playing with one competitive or travel team while the other team is more recreational. Obviously the demands of recreational sports and competitive sports is often very different, but when combined can still create a situation where a child is over-scheduled and not getting the proper rest throughout the week in relation to one sport or the others.

The other issue arises when the athlete is very good at both sports. Often, it can become inappropriate for a player to play at the recreational level of a sport because of their level of play. It can lead to a negative experience for the player, his teammates, and other teams in the league if a player has clearly outgrown this level of play. The player can be seen as a “ringer” and does not belong due to running up high scores or clearly dominating even the next strongest players.

If a player is good and loves to play multiple sports, and they overlap in seasons, then what do we expect the parent or player to do? Pick? This could be an impossible decision for both. Playing at the recreational level at any of the sports is not fun for the player or really that appropriate, and playing competitively at both sports is not appropriate for the physical and mental health of the athlete. It becomes a very tough decision, so it is understandable for the player to try to both even though it could be too much.

To help with this problem, sports need to offer competitive options that are not yearly or multiple season commitments. This would give players more options to play and train at a level that is appropriate for them, while not having to stack the same sports in the same season. Coaches and programs would need to allow flexibility for kids to play just for a single season or not train in the “off-season” without it being seen as a lack of commitment or dedication to their sport or a lack of drive to improve.

Instead, it would be supporting the multi-sport platform and the benefits that come with it that have been well documented. There will still be players who just participate in a single sport and train more than others, but that does not mean that those players will necessarily have an advantage over the kids who do not train year round. But, it also could mean that they do, but that is ok, because that is how it goes sometimes.

Every player is different and every situation is different, so players who want to, and do, play multiple sports, need to be handled according to what is best for that particular player. With that said, it has to be recognized that there are additional dangers with kids playing multiple sports that overlap in season. Just like a player who specializes and is just playing one sport without rest, a player with multiple sports and no rest could be in an even more developmentally inappropriate situation that can have more negative effects than just playing one sport. There can be additional wear and tear on the body. In reality, the training and time has just doubled… along with diversifying the experiences. The real goal would be to diversify in sports without drastically adding to the number of hours/time spent training and playing to create the most developmentally ideal and safe playing experience possible.

In short, there are issues with specialization, but there can be even more issues with playing multiple sports at the same time. It is all about balance which is what the original push against specialization was based on. Although you want to be careful not to paint everyone with the same brush. What is right for one person is not right for another. Although, most agree that a proper balance needs to be struck between sports and other aspects of life. Especially when the push to play one sport or multiple sports is coming from adults with goals of making higher level teams, scholarships, professional contracts etc, there are a lot of adverse effects to the child.

We do not want to acknowledge the dangers of specialization, but at the same time, have kids stretched thin between multiple sports and only point to the benefits. The benefits of being a multi-sport athlete can quickly diminished by the overwork and fatigue placed on the body. We want to be careful we do not move from one extreme side of spectrum of youth sports to the other.

Kids can play one sport, or play multiple sports, but parents and coaches need to be constantly monitoring the player’s physical and mental condition. The player must be enjoying the experience and growing within that experience. It should be self-driven, and not externally driven. The player has to want it, not just the coach and/or parents.

As a child who loved one sport, I understand what it is like to have a passion for something and pursue it relentlessly. It has sacrifices and struggles, but I never did it for any other reason except that I loved it. I do not think that is right for most kids. And, what about the child who is truly passionate about multiple sports or activities? Do we deny the opportunity to pursue both? I think that is a hard thing to do.

In the end, we do not want to push kids in specializing in one sport because we think it will help them achieve more, and we also do not want to push kids into playing multiple sports because new research shows it is better for them and many high level athletes played multiple sports. The common ground there is the word PUSH. It is the PUSH from adults and coaches that make either scenario inappropriate for the child.

Know your child. Know your players. Make decisions based on what is best for them and what they love to do and are passionate about. Do not make decisions or push one way or the other out of fear your child or team will be left behind or will lose opportunities to be successful.